Are you guilty of pigeon-holing yourself and getting STUCK before you even START? I know that when I began my journey as an entrepreneur, I had tunnel vision in a niche that just wasn’t my joy and calling.
I thought I could only help others with something that was “practical” and conventional. Being a mom, I knew I could help other women with their routines, their pregnancies, and their journey into motherhood. I kept things pretty vanilla… never venturing into such taboo areas as sexuality or spirituality.
I hid my own journey of personal development through birth (for fear that women who were NOT mothers wouldn't be able to relate). I kept myself from sharing my wild intuition and accurate vision of someone's business alignment. I didn't push ANY boundaries that felt uncomfortable.
I chased systems, solutions, and education thinking that maybe... somewhere... someone would have that GOLDEN TICKET answer that would show me the way. In my head I heard...
Stick with logical.
Stick with rational.
Stick with normal.
Pushing and pressing on, I tried to find clients who I could serve. I gave away free session after free session helping anyone I could. Every woman got great results and was able to decrease her stress and find grounded structure again… but I ended my days feeling less than inspired, and wondering if I was really cut out for any service based work.
I started to feel burnt out. Exhausted. And a little bit lost.
I was six months into my coaching business when I realized I was keeping myself from fully expressing my creativity, my intuition, and my gifts. Thankfully, I had insatiable curiosity on my side and I wondered… What would it be like to feel really free to serve others the way my heart was calling me to?
What if I could use all of my gifts, instead of just the ones that wouldn’t rock the boat?
What if I could take my insatiable love of learning and the holistic healing tools, spiritual practices, energy work, and straight coaching… and let them all integrate in my work?
What if I could unleash my intuition and actually help others… and myself on a deeper level?
What if I could just… be me?
Have you been there… or are you there now? That crazy-making place of doubt, fear, and overwhelm…
When it seems like what other people think of you is tantamount to your success?
Where you toss and turn at night because you feel so stuck, so foggy, and downright frustrated that you’re holding back this amazing part of who you are?
That ache that comes with silencing our own voices and keeping our story behind closed doors… is relentless.
But I also know that underneath all of that is a deeper part of you where you just KNOW with certainty that you have all of the answers you need...
That you’re divinely provided for...
That you’re here to love and serve and give and receive abundantly...
AND - that you simply CANNOT do that while denying that voice of wisdom within you, the glimpses of truth you see in your daydreams, the nudges and “coincidences” that happen around you.
There were SEVEN major blocks that kept me from fully owning and expressing my intuition. These kept ME just as unaware of the full power and potential of this gift as it did others. And that, my friend, is just plain sad!
My business brought me face to face with these blocks and I had to admit my own truth. I had to listen, finally. I don’t want YOU to struggle as long as I did - which, truly was YEARS before I started my business… so I’m sharing here WHAT those seven blocks were and WHY they have changed and shaped my work and how I show up in the world.
#1: My Thinking
Growing up, I was very academic. I loved learning, I loved reading, and I loved school.
I think we can all identify with the huge emphasis on book-smart education. We learn that this one particular type of intelligence is valuable, and what will get us into college and then into a great job.
The massive down side to our dependence on text book learning and over-testing ourselves is that we neglect to foster or even affirm at all the less “tangible” gifts.
Intuition, psychic abilities, empathic gifts, and even a heart to serve aren’t a part of how we’re taught to operate in the world for success. Heck, we don’t even learn how to have a basically successful relationship in school!
After middle school I stopped reading books about magical lands. Far gone were the days of building an airplane out of cardboard and hoping I could fly to those very same far off places. I let go of memories of the little bags of gemstone rocks I always collected, and forgot about the “book of answers” I used to play with. Jeannie’s bottle got packed away with older toys, and slowly but surely everything seemed a little less enchanting and quite a lot more serious and grown up.
It wasn’t until I started to rekindle this flame within me and recognize the glimpses of my intuition and deep divine knowing in stories I remembered of my childhood and experiences I’d had as I grew older that were inexplicable on a logical level, that I realized there was something MORE.
Something more to me, and something more to what I had to give in the world.
This logic-dependence and left-brain overdrive was the first big block and hindrance to me fully owning and using my own intuition.
Where have you experienced this denial of your own intuition?
#2: Social Taboos
On the heels of the academia-wired-me came social taboos that said that things like spirituality and holistic healing were just… hogwash! I wasn’t surrounded by others exploring their identity or beliefs and so, I learned in secret.
I would literally turn books around on my bookshelf when company was coming, not like pages on Facebook (thinking they’d show up in someone else’s feed), and keep from sharing much of what I was working on with friends and family.
For lack of confidence in my own guidance, intuition, and wisdom, I defaulted to staying quiet on matters that were incredibly important to me, skirting topics I didn’t want to be judged for having opinions on, and I kept my gifts off limits unless I was in a private FB group that I knew was full of people who would accept me.
Holding back to keep the peace was not serving me, or the women who truly needed what I had to share.
How have you shut down your intuition in social situations because of a fear of judgement?
Now, I don’t have a typical story on this one!
I didn’t grow up super religious. My family wasn’t especially conservative or spiritual. I was vaguely Christian, and we were good people who believed that God existed, so we would go to heaven. All I really knew about Jesus as a kid was what I had learned from felt boards and tiny tracts I received when I dressed up in my fancy dress to go to church with my best friend after a sleepover.
It wasn’t until I dated a guy in high school who came from a family who was Jehovah’s witness that I really dove in to my Christian faith.
Yeah, read that again.
His own beliefs and opinions made me question my own. Some things he said didn’t make sense or sit well with me personally… so I knew I had to seek my own truth and “figure out what I believed.” On a Friday afternoon we broke up. Things were tense with his family (who thought he should only “date to mate” and preferably not date anyone outside of the church) and I didn’t feel like I could fully love or understand all of who he was
That very next Sunday I decided to go to church to find the answers I was craving… and I never looked back.
When I bought my first Bible, I read, re-read, and memorized the “Love” passage from 1 Corinthians… and the verses right around there about spiritual gifts. I prayed and PRAYED for those things!
I wanted to EXPERIENCE God.
I wanted to see miracles, healing, prophecy, and whatever other magic God wanted to send my way.
I was ready.
So, when I found that I really did have a few of those spiritual gifts… but that they weren’t always accepted even in the church (mind spinning yet?)… I wasn’t sure what to do with them.
Again… I let them lay dormant. I didn’t pursue my own gifts. I kept them quiet.
As you can imagine, there’s so much more to tell here, but in short… I wrestled time and time again with what was “okay” by church status quo standards.
Was it okay to use muscle testing? What about pendulums? Are crystals some kind of weird magic? Is energy work false healing? What about these visions I have? Can I use oracle cards? What about moon circles? Are they okay? Acupuncture? Meridians? Yoga? Kundalini? Psychics?
Oh… good grief… the list seemed ENDLESS.
Then, something shifted. Not once, but several times.
I trusted and acted.
I trusted that anything false would fail and fade away. I asked God for answers, for guidance, for wisdom, and I was always answered. I tuned in to my own inner knowing and intuition and acted on it. I stopped worrying about what other people would think, let go of my ideas of the big hairy scary Church, and I started to just be the ME that I was created to be.
Recently, I’ve realized that religion is a sore spot of hurt, judgement, legalism, and restriction for so many. Christian or not.
Has there been a time for you in the past or recently where you felt you had to hide or stifle your intuition because it somehow went against your religious beliefs or because you were taught it was against God?
#4: “Past Lives"
I’m going to be totally real with you, this is where things get weird.
If you haven’t a CLUE what I’m talking about when I say “past lives” don’t worry. The first time someone explained them to me I was thrown for a loop.
I had posted in a Facebook group to ask if anyone had experienced a struggle with their religion (or fear of judgement from certain friends in a church) conflicting with their path as an intuitive or healer.
A sweet woman reached out to me and offered some intuitive guidance… suggesting that there may have been a “past life” issue around it. She was a psychic herself and she shared an entire story with me about what she saw.
All I can say is that it absolutely brought me to tears and was, present day, exactly what I felt and was going through at the time – just in a different time period. She explained that she saw me as this magical healer who was persecuted by the church for being different and having these gifts…
It was still a stretch for me to think I had been actually re-incarnated or lived another life, but I could understand that I somehow had inherited this trauma since I had several midwives in my lineage and historically midwives were killed for being “witches.
Still today, I don’t view “past lives” as a literal re-incarnation, but I have seen this old, stagnant energy being cleared totally open doors for myself and my clients and remove deep, visceral fear triggers that don’t have any logical experiential roots.
Do you find that you’re stuck or triggered around being intuitive, a healer, or otherwise magical in ways that don’t make sense to you?
Heaps. Of. Doubt.
And allllll of the wrong questions.
Mind-dizzying and intuition nauseating questions like… Am I right? What if I’m wrong? How do I know if that’s my intuition for REAL? Am I just imagining things? What’s the difference between imagination and intuition anyway? Could this just be my ego? Who am I to be intuitive or psychic? What makes me special enough to know anything out of the “ordinary?”
And no, I’m not over here reading your mind – it’s just the REALITY of exploring your intuition.
Yes, it gets better. No, I don’t think it ever 100% goes away.
For me, it was run of the mill uncertainty and worry that I would listen to myself only to be let down or that I would trust the wrong voice or answer.
I felt like I just didn’t have the guidance or the example of confidence that showed me how to deal with this doubt and for me it cropped up the MOST when I actually reached out a hand to help someone and began to use that intuitive muscle.
Doubt was a MAJOR hinderance to me finding true alignment and confidence.
When do you feel doubt start to plague you the most? Is it when you first hear or feel an intuitive pull, or is it when you try to ACT on your intuition?
#6: Holding my Tongue
I know it’s really popular to tell women to say “no” more often, but what I preach now and what my real struggle was before – was knowing when to shout my YES from the rooftops
My voice, and my YES were held in and pushed down by no one other than myself for far too long.
I thought if I just held my tongue, didn’t ask the uncomfortable questions, and played the role of being the good girl that I knew so well, that things would be okay.
Maybe if I just held my tongue I’d feel comfortable… because everyone around me would feel comfortable.
My voice was choked out. I couldn’t get what I needed or desired in my relationship with myself, with God, or even my husband. I cut myself off from my true voice.
The big block and realization for me here came when I noticed that my writing was good, but wasn’t always reflecting ME. I wasn’t poetic when I wanted to be, sassy when I wanted to be, and I felt like I couldn’t or shouldn’t swear… ever. I noticed that I was trying to say all of the RIGHT things instead of saying what I truly needed to express.
I found that in order to honor my intuition and fully be IN my own body, present in every moment, I had to use my voice to EXPRESS myself openly.
When I held my tongue, nothing could possibly CHANGE for me.
Where are you blocking your voice, your writing, your expression and keeping yourself in the “right” zone instead of in your YES zone?
By far, the biggest block I’ve experienced and the thing I run in to with almost every single one of my clients is this one – SHAME.
As a kid, I was never grounded and several of my most vivid memories in school come from the handful of times I was ever reprimanded. I even immediately and nervously confessed to my mom once that no parents had been at my friend’s house (when I had been told by said friend that they would be). I had a guilty conscience like none other.
I never wanted to be misunderstood, wrong, or in trouble.
We all have this instinct within us. This desire to be seen, heard, understood, valued, and worthy.
Whether we’re verbally told we aren’t one of these things or there’s a strongly implied rule we have to follow to be accepted, we hold on to shame.
Shame is this: covering.
Shame says “I’m wrong, I need to be hidden.”
And in our hiding, we shiver. We shake. We cower.
We rehearse the lines we’ve heard or made up in our minds about being invisible, drowned out in the noise, unimportant, wrong, worthless, and unwanted.
For me, shame came in the way, specifically, of my intuition being some sort of unparalleled evil.
To be clear, this was never expressed to me by anyone verbally, I just felt that it needed to be covered so that I could remain outwardly accepted and safe.
When we fear our own intuition and shame ourselves for exercising it… we literally cover ourselves, our divine spark, and hold tight to our beliefs about what it means to just BE us.
When I covered up ME, I felt that claustrophobic, suffocating feeling in my very bones.
How has shame shown up in your life? What about your intuition makes you want to hide it away?
I know you're probably thinking that YOU can relate to so many of these and see how all of these show up for YOU and how they form this web of confusion, overwhelm, and doubt.
So, what will you DO with this new awareness?
How will you shift these blocks and what do you need to shift them IN to?
It’s time to stop desperately scurrying around and join me to learn how to flip each one of these blocks – and how you can clear any other blocks standing in the way of you fully knowing the power of your own intuition. I hear you...
You're ready take your intuition to the next level...
You're ready to own YOUR gifts fully to get the answers you deeply crave...
You're ready for direction in your LIFE and BUSINESS that come from WITHIN...
And you KNOW it's time to stop holding yourself back and OVERCOME the inertia of STUCK to get into aligned, compulsive, creative action again.
I have been where you are now, and I’ve flipped every one of these blocks standing in my way on my journey to owning my intuitive gifts and even finally admitting how POWERFUL and NEEDED my own gifts are in the world. What if you felt THAT confident too?
For me, doing this inner work has meant success and alignment in my spirituality, marriage, motherhood, AND finding that sweet spot with my purpose in the world.
Love, what you have now is AWARENESS... Gaining awareness is your FIRST step... but taking ACTION to do something about that is what comes next.
Ready to sort out your blocks, blow up your own intuition, and learn how I cleared these 7 MAJOR blocks that I had? I'm ready to spill my toolbox and let you have a look inside. Just CLICK HERE for your peek (Pssst... it's totally FREE!).